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'via Blog this'
“You're not the first to get lost here while trying to find a state that's not a shithole.”
“Echo!...echo...echo...echo...ooh, hey!”
“Fuck!”
| Pennsylvania: The Quacker State The state flag of Pennsylvania | |
|---|---|
| State Flower: | Your Daughter's |
| Official Languages: | English |
| State Toy: | Slinky (100% true) |
| State Fish: | Whatever New Jersey has, we'll take |
| State Motto: | "You got a purdy mouth..." |
| Nickname: | Pennsyltucky |
| Currency: | U.S. Dollar, Cheesesteak, Goat Testicles |
| Principal Imports: | Trees, Quackers |
| Principal Exports: | Rednecks ,Jail Bait, Inbreads,Granny Porn |
| Climate: | Warm Summers and Freakin' Cold Winters |
| AKA: | The Commonwealth that wishes it was a state |
Native Americans (Indians)
The Indians knowing which side of the bread was being buttered immediately fled the area or hid . Those that hid are still there today disguised as acorns, chestnuts, tree stumps, mud puddles, poison ivy and a few other things.
editFranklinites
Franklinites are a diverse group of followers of Ben. They remain low key and in the background.
editObese Morons
They cover a wide geographical range & make up -6% of the commonwealth's population. They enjoy partaking in the gourmet delicacies offered throughout the state, such as: cheesesteaks, Primantis, Hershey's chocolate, pierogies, Auntie Anne's pretzels, potato chips, ketchup, apple sauce, milk, butter (did you SEE the butter sculpture at the farm show??), scrapple, cheez whiz straight from the can, Yuengling, Yuengling Lager, Yeungling Light Lager, Yeungling Bock, Yeungling Black & Tan, Yeungling Octoberfest & Lebanon bologna. Now you know why everyone in the state is fat, no vegetables are in the Pennsylvania diet except potato chips & ketchup.
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